Back to the Jungle?! Rather not

Though I have just returned from a long ramble, I taste the irresistible need to fly away again. Again, and right in the instant. I cannot feel my place here. Not anymore. I am a foreigner on my own homeland. Yet, it is not the land that estranges me. These are the people, the state and society. I feel a loner among my own people. Blame me, I know you can, and should I expect anything different in the place of your reaction?! I shall not. Blame me, if you wish, but I shall not care. Not anymore. I am already a stranger, belonging to a disparate world of ideals and humans.

I am the stranger, far away from you, sober and conscious, I am not turning back.

We used to have our common world together until the two halves alienated. Two trails that lost their common path and parted long ago. My trail used to approach faster, and your trail never got the initial motive to leave the zero point. You never had the true motive for moving forward. What you did this entire time was leaning your motion on my inertia and slowing me down. Not anymore. I have changed for better, and you stayed still. After all, I am sure to find you at the same place ever I want to seek back for you. However, I shall not. For, I am not turning back.

I have walked a long path and I have learnt my lessons; tore out pails of shoes, fell down stumbled innumerable times and found the strengths to stand up again and step on, move forward. Then, at the end of the hard rambling, I reached the door of my civilization and opened it in. No exit back is what I desire.

I have outlived alternation, and nothing can be the same as before.

If I succeeded to go through all that I did in the meanwhile, you were the one choosing to stay at the permanent point of your barbarity. The only one of two.

Yes, you are the one to choose my departure, to let my walk turn into a leaving. For, if you ever wanted me here, you should have made me stay. You would have helped me find my sense and happiness with you; you would have wanted to understand me, less, you would just ask me, “why do you feel the way you do”, in the place of, “well, if you don’t like it, go away then”…

And here I am now, at the crossroad, thinking of flying away and you come to only offer me the jungle…

CLASS OF ’04

track >> PLAY
band >> guns n’ roses
lyrics >> welcome to the jungle

You better not!! A human is not staying in the jungle when having known civilization. It is against the human nature. In their instincts as well as in their consciousness people need to feel secure, seek for happiness and comfort. That is why they build homes, families in their homes, societies around them and states protecting all. They call these – civilization. And when civilization comes to turn into a jungle, spoils, rots, ruins, fades away, it is human to react, get tired and want another change, improvement. People will step on and approach to their balance. They would rather turn around and forward to a settled village or find escape into a sheltered hut in the green… Turning back to the jungle, they will rather not.

If we do not react against our staying in the jungle, have we remained humans then?!